I Don’t Know What I’m Going To Do If the Toronto Blue Jays Get to the World Series

This is becoming a weekly article and I’m getting legitimately nervous that the Toronto Blue Jays may never lose a baseball game again. I’m shaking as I write this. No team has been in my head like this before. The Red Sox pitchers throw beach balls so they’re a non-factor. The Baltimore Orioles don’t matter after August. The Rays? Laugh out loud.

But the Toronto fucking Blue Jays. I reallyyyy needed the Texas Rangers to step up and bail me out but nope, the Rangers had the most deceptive record in baseball. They were so average in that series. It’s as if the Rangers didn’t realize that the playoffs began. Either that, or they hate me and want to see me suffer. Probably a combination of both.

I need the Cleveland Indians to beat the Blue Jays more than I need anything. I can’t go another day watching Josh Donaldson’s lame ass celebrating every single run scored like it’s the biggest deal on the planet. I can’t watch Edwin Encarnacion casually punch baseballs to the moon. Literally every bomb he hits is a go-ahead shot. Oh, also Troy Tulowitzki is a bitch. Fuck the Toronto Blue Jays.




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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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