— Jason Basra (@jasonbasra) April 10, 2018
Dear Tristan Thompson, you can’t be in a very public relationship with a Kardashian, the royal family of the United States, and make out with an Instagram model in an extremely crowded club in Manhattan as if you’re not a 7-foot tall famous person.
In 2016, Tristan had his first son, Prince, with his ex Jordan Craig while simultaneously dating Khloe Kardashian. Not only does he love cheating on pregnant girlfriends but he loves waiting until the third and final trimester before he dips out for his new bae.
Khloe Kardashian is mega pregnant right now. That baby could come flying out of her at any moment over in Cleveland while Tristan is out in New York spending the weekend at SoHo House with Instagram model, Lani Blair
I love this picture of Tristan with Lani outside of the hotel because he is so clearly on the phone with Khloe lying about having a quiet night in the room reading his bible and shit while Lani is in the background asking ‘should we pick up condoms?’ (and you know Tristan said no).
As a New York Knicks fan, this is the biggest victory of the season. Tristan comes to New York to finish the year and ends up ruining his life. He was already having a down year and now the last thing on his mind is playing basketball. Thankfully, LeBron pushed for Tristan to get that huge contract he didn’t deserve because all of that money will be going into his ex’s pockets.
New York is undefeated.
Somewhere in the world, Lamar Odom sheds a single tear as he lays next to some Craigslist hooker that he pays exclusively with crack.
Tristan Thompson: Father of the Year.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Tristan Thompson is proooooobably a bad guy. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.