rachel Balkovec

The New York Yankees Continue To Be The Greatest Organization in Sports After Hiring The First Female Hitting Coach in MLB History

It is an absolute honor to be a New York Yankees fan as they consistently remain at the top of the mountain in professional sports.

Meet Rachel Balkovec, the 32 year old set to make history as she becomes the first female hitting coach for the Yankees minor league team this February.

Sure, it’s only the minor leagues but it’s insane for ‘America’s Pasttime’ to have never allowed women to really participate in any way outside of being ball galls and shit.

Or perhaps the dismissal of women is perfectly indicative of what America is.

Rachel Balkovec has two master’s degrees in the science of human movement and she taught herself Spanish so she can effectively communicate with the Latin born players.

There’s a lottttt of Major League coaches who are significantly less prepared than she appears to be. *cough* Mickey Calloway *cough*

There’s only one red flag on Balkovec ‘s resume: In 2018, she was the strength and conditioning coach for the Houston Astros AA team.

If I’m learning anything from this investigation into the 2017 Houston Astros stealing signs to rob the league of a World Series, it was a full organizational commitment from the top down. No doubt in my mind they tried things out in AAA and AA before they used it against the Kansas City Royals.

At least we know that the Yankees minor league team is going to put up historic hitting numbers. Whether it’s because she’s overqualified for the job or she’s banging trash cans in the dugout, she’s going to excel.

Another W for the 27-time World Series Champions. Your fav team could never.

Also, please replace Marcus Thames soon. Plz. Aaron Judge can strike out in 20 straight at-bats and Thames will pull him aside at batting practice and say ‘man, that stinks, huh? Anyway, good luck today’ as he has his cell phone is his other hand refreshing his TD Bank app waiting for his direct deposit to kick in.

Save us, Rachel.

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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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