The MAGA Capital Siege Was Hilariously Horrifying

On Wednesday there was a mega chill Capital Siege as Trump lunatics gathered in DC to protect us from a stolen election or whatever the fuck those lame Facebook ads paid for by Kelly Loeffler’s campaign are saying. It was hilarious and horrifying at the same time.

Donald Trump, the man who lost the popular vote to Hillary Clinton—one of the most hated women in America—in 2016, lost another election to Joe Biden—one of the dementia-brained men in America— a couple months ago. Needless to say, Trump didn’t take that news well and neither did his legion of sexually frustrated fans.

This week, Joe Biden was being certified as the new president when Trump told his rabid followers to head to Capitol Hill and ‘take back the country’. Naturally, hundreds of goofy weirdos stormed the Capitol to stop Congress from verifying the election results.

What should’ve been a day full of arrests and tear gas and MAGA hats exploding off people’s domes when they get blasted with rubber bullets turned into these people just casually walking into the Capital building after some light shoving by local police who clearly didn’t give a single shit whether or not these rioters got inside.

The Capital Siege begins.

There was some loose gunfire and 4 people lost their lives (lol) but for the most part, there was zero physical conflict. Congressmen were forced to hide in fear while (white) dudes with Trump flags cosplaying as revolutionists and heroes just wasted a paid time off day to take photos with their Twitter mutuals and pretend as if they’re about to chop AOC’s head off.

It was a very annoying day for those of us who understand completely why this occurred. So many people came out with the same ‘if this was a black lives matters protest then the police would’ve beat the shit out of them’. But like, we know. We all know this.

The only reason why the cops weren’t participating in the Capital Siege themselves was because they couldn’t get the day off. The entire day was the Spider-Man pointing at Spider-Man meme. People were incorrectly labeling the event as a ‘civil war’ which implies a conflict that was brother vs. brother but in actuality the brothers were the MAGA losers and the cops and they worked together with some lazy pushing like when you pretend to work hard as your boss walks by.

There is no effective reason to compare this to the BLM protests where real violence occurred. All it does is continue to fetishize violence against brown people. We get it. We don’t need to play dumb here.

The pentagon denied permission to send military help to the Capital. We don’t need to point out how the Senate just voted to pass a $740 BILLION military budget two weeks ago while only agreeing to give people $600 stimulus checks after record-breaking levels of unemployment due to a global pandemic that the government did nothing to protect us from or prepare us for.

“Why don’t they call these people terrorists?” “Why aren’t the Proud Boys labeled as a terrorist group?” “Why is this being called a protest but BLM protests are called riots?” Nah, we’re not doing this in 2021. We know why.

This is all obvious and pretending to not understand is exactly why this happened. We live in a country where being white is the greatest commodity and protecting that against any slight equality is completely allowed and encouraged by the president of the United States.

Fucking horrifying.

But also hilarious because these Trump freaks are just Youtube commentators who think Ben Shapiro is the ideal model of masculinity.

Fucking hilarious.

Do we pretend like this elderly woman shook past police or can we all agree that they were welcomed and escorted in by police and once inside they had no idea what to do but just like, pee on the walls and go home before mom’s dinner got cold.

No one has anything to fear right now. The Capital Siege was wild and helped us kill some time at work but this isn’t anything *new*. These people have been here since literally day one of America.

If we want change then we need to start organizing as well as these lunatics do and demand better from elected officials who march with us and then tell us to stop talking about defunding the police that just let thousands walk right into Nancy Pelosi’s office without scratches on them.

Also lol at the 4 people that died. Imagine dying for Stormy Daniels’s ex? Laugh out loud.



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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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