chicago cubs pitching staff

The Chicago Cubs Pitching Staff is Historically Atrocious

The Chicago Cubs are ranked 29th in team ERA right now which makes sense when you pair it with the fact that they are allowing every single batter to walk to first base without even having to swing the bat. All you have to do is step into the batter’s box and you’ll end up back at home plate in about 16 minutes.

The Cubs are currently 1-5 on the season and that one win is fake news. I can’t find the footage of that victory. Release the pee tapes, Chicago.

Cole Hamels gave up 5 runs in 5 innings against the Texas Rangers. Kyle Hendricks gave up 7 runs in 4 innings against the Atlanta Braves.

Yu Darvish is continuing his amazing Cubs career. He has two starts this season. He hasn’t got past the 5th inning in either start yet. In two starts, he’s allowed 7 hits, 6 runs and 11 base on balls. His ERA is 8.10. This bitch.

The Milwaukee Brewers are 6-1 and about to run away with the division. Yes, it’s the first week of April and some might say that it’s too early to panic. I’m not one of those people. Falling 5 games behind to the first place team when your pitchers can’t locate the strike zone means you might as well scratch this season entirely. It’s an L.

SEEEE YAAAA, Chicago.

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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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