Ted Cruz Caught Fapping on 9/11

Ted Cruz, you dirty dog. While everyone is honoring the victims lost in the attack on the twin towers, Ted Cruz isn’t just fapping but he’s liking porn on Twitter to save it for later. Ted Cruz is the type of guy to make an account on Pornhub so that he can save videos and make playlists for later and leave comments like ‘mmmm’ or ‘what’s her name?’.

We reaaaally dropped the ball not electing this creep into the Oval Office. There would be so many amazing stories about him whipping out in Air Force One and touching butts left and right. Donald Trump is kicking trans people out of the military while Cruz would’ve been accidentally posting trans porn on Instagram or something.

Shout out to my girl Cory Chase for being in Cruz’s video. Never expected Cruz to be a Reality Kings type of guy. He seems more like an amateur porn watcher but he also seems like he’s seen every single video on Spank Bang so yea, he likes it all. Whether it’s September 2nd or September 11th, Ted Cruz is fapping.






Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Cruz is probably fapping right this second. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.



Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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