Look, sometimes you see a stack of bud light sitting by the front door at local gas station and it appears like it’s a free giveaway. Can’t blame my man for making a simple mistake that we’ve all made countless times.
Here is a textbook definition of a beer run. This beer baron swiped 5 cases from a convenience store in the 5000 block of Little School Road and took off. He left in a Gray Dodge truck. ? Det. Thompson if you recognize him, 817-459-6054 or email, email@example.com pic.twitter.com/un3So55wB1
— Arlington Police, TX (@ArlingtonPD) October 17, 2018
You have no idea how many times I’ve wanted to do this. Whenever I walk into a 7-Eleven and see the stack of beer in front of the freezers, I want to just scoop them all up and head out to enjoy my night of sin. Maybe stop by the counter to tip my cap to the friendly cashier allowing me to run their pockets.
This man is my hero. Shout out to Terry Crews-lite putting his middle finger up at our society. Love that second security photo that shows him with 5 stacks of Bud Light in his arms as he cautiously looks over at the front counter looking like Homer Simpson sneaking out of the house to go to Moe’s Tavern.
Also real quick, if anyone sees this man in the streets and you call the cops, you’re a bitch. That should go without saying but I really hope I don’t see a story later today about my man getting arrested because some narc sees the black Incredible Hulk dragging out bags upon bags of empty Bud Light cans on recycling day.
Scamming Hall of Fame forever. Can’t. Knock. The. Hustle.
If anyone at Bud Light HQ is reading this, sponsor Deadseriousness, coward.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you might try this move out later this weekend. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.