sammy sosa

Sammy Sosa Looks Like a Penis

Sooo Sammy Sosa straight up looks like a penis now. He looks like Jack Nicholson’s Joker…..’s penis. Who the fuck dressed him in all pink? It looks like his laundry mixed with Carmen San Diego’s.

I’ve never seen anyone look so much like a penis. It’s nut.1 He either bleaches his skin to the point where he is just human powder or he legitimately paints himself, you know, like a psychopath would do.

This is what happens when all you know how to do is mash baseballs. Once people take baseballs away from you, you turn into living dust. Sammy Sosa looks like Ashy Larry…’s penis.

Can someone get this man a glass of water? And again, you cannot have pink skin and wear your mother’s Easter Sunday church hat at the same time. Pick one look.






Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Sammy Sosa looks like a penis. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

  1. fire pun alert.
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