in ,

Robert Kraft Getting Arrested For a Happy Ending Massage Should Make Us All Re-Evaluate Sex Workers in America

Robert Kraft was arrested leaving the wonderful ‘Orchids of Asia’ spa in Jupiter, Florida, as the police had been investigating this ‘spa’ for awhile and determined that the female employees were part of a transcontinental sex trafficking ring where Chinese women were tricked into coming to America only to become sex slaves.

There is some reaaaaal heavy shit going on at this spa.

These women being deprived of days off and showers and a majority of the money kind of makes it difficult to get all of these Robert Kraft jokes off.

I want so desperately to mock the billionaire owner of the most successful sports franchise of the new millennium having an end-of-life crisis taking private jets and limos to the local rug n tug joint located next to the pet store and 24-hour check cashing spot so he can pay $30 for a 7-minute blowjob.

But the conflict is, the woman who was paid to blow his shriveled up old man wee wee, actually got none of that money and was basically being held hostage against her will in a disgusting sex slavery ring directed to target the wealthy elite who have homes in Jupiter.

We also have to take a step back and separate what Robert Kraft did with what’s going on in Orchids of Asia.

Assuming that Kraft wasn’t aware of these women’s indentured servitude and the overall sex trafficking situation, I think we have to separate an elderly dude paying a woman to blow him and that woman actively participating with her own free and actually receiving that money to pay their bills and pay for lunch and stuff—and the men who hold women captive and force them to perform sex acts on men against their will as they receive none of that money or any time off.

That’s a long-winded way of me saying that what Robert Kraft did wasn’t really ‘wrong’ but the location in which he decided to do that was the wrongest building in Florida and fuck Orchids of Asia.

But for everyone outraged at what Kraft did, let’s not treat sex work like this evil industry that should be thwarted at all costs. Making gambling and sex work illegal is a strange way for the government to determine a line of morality that is in no way objective or universally accepted.

Plus, since I’m shaking my fist at the sky, is it odd to anyone else that the local government is more concerned about legislating what women can and can’t do with their own body than they are about classroom sizes and the gigantic craters in the road they refuse to re-pave?

The sex trafficking aspect of the Robert Kraft arrest, albeit much more serious, is a totally different issue than a guy with all of the disposable income in the world just wanting to pay another consenting adult to slap around his little geriatric weiner.

So let us both laugh at Kraft while simultaneously hoping every single individual who ran this prostitution ring get the death penalty. And let’s not use this story as an opportunity to shit on sex workers as if they are sub-human when in actuality, they just found a loophole around working a 9-to-5 and punching a clock. We should be saluting these entrepreneurs.

But most importantly, lol at Robert Kraft.




Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think the conversation about this Robert Kraft arrest feels wrong. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Follow on Instagram so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

Leave a Reply