Game of Thrones season 7 has come and gone and it was a rollercoaster ride of emotions. We had the return of Nymeria but then in the very same breath, we had Ed Sheeran singing for no reason. A rollercoaster ride indeed.
Before I sit here and complain, I should mention that this season was easily the most fun I’ve had watching this show in a long time. Zero rape scenes, believe it or not so that’s an accomplishment. It was a thrill ride to say the least but it certainly wasn’t the same show that I spent the last 6 years enjoying.
Here are 9 reasons why Game of Thrones Season 7 was the worst season ever:
1. Travel Times
From the very first episode of season 7, it was impossible to ignore how quickly everyone was traveling around Westeros as if teleportation exists. Euron Greyjoy pops up in King’s Landing to slide into Cersei’s DMs and then magically appears outside of Greystone by dinnertime only to be back in King’s Landing presumably the next morning. Oh, and he’s also at Casterly Rock to strand the Unsullied there within the same 24 hours.
Euron is such a plot device that it’s fine. I don’t mind that his ships have motor engines. How is Jon Snow traveling from Winterfell to Greystone to Beyond the Wall in the same time it takes Jaime to get from King’s Landing to High Garden?
The most egregious example is in the Beyond The Wall episode in which the first 20 minutes consists of short convos between the handful of men given the dumbest task in Game of Thrones history. Over the course of these brief conversations, we are to believe that time is elapsing as they are traveling a great distance to find the White Walkers. But then once they’re in trouble, they send Gendry who runs allll the way back to the Wall like he’s Barry Allen only then to reveal that both ravens and dragons can travel at the speed of light so that Daenerys can arrive to save them all before one of them even gets the sniffles.
What made the first seasons so great is that travel times meant something. We rooted for Daenerys so hard because we saw her walk with the Dothraki for like, two full seasons before they were able to find a place in Essos to call home. When Jon was past the wall with The Wildlings, it seemed like they were out there forever. Travel times add scale to the world you’ve created and stakes. Teleportation makes Westeros seem like the size of Toms River, New Jersey.