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On What Fucking Planet Does Donald Trump Only Weigh 239 Pounds?

President Donald Trump’s doctor, Dr. Ronny Jackson, characterized the president’s health as “excellent,” but like the majority of Americans, Trump is overweight and he doesn’t get enough exercise.

The President weighs 239 pounds. That means he’s gained 3 pounds over the last year, according to his last official records. At 6 feet, 3 inches tall, Trump had a body mass index, or BMI, that puts him in the “overweight” range, according to the National Institutes of Health’s online BMI calculator. Being overweight is simply defined as a person whose weight is higher than what is considered a normal weight adjusted for height. The President is one pound shy of being considered obese, according to these calculations.

(CNN)

 

“The president weighs 239 pounds” is the most hilarious statement I’ve ever read. It’s pretty convenient that he happens to weigh in 1 pound short of being obese. Shout out to Dr. Ronny Jackson for getting himself onto the Trump payroll. It’s a great gig if you can get. All you have to do is lie in a press conference about how perfect Trump is then refresh your bank account as you walk back to your car and you can suddenly afford anything you want for the rest of your life. The jealousy is real.

Donald Trump is the size of two Donald Trumps. He has the same body as Oogie Boogie from The Nightmare Before Christmas. In what world is the man who eats McDonald’s every single day in ‘excellent’ health. Donald Trump could die from a heart attack tomorrow and it would be the least surprising part of his presidency.

Also, don’t trust a physician named ‘Dr. Ronny Jackson’. That’s a man who is reallyyy going to enjoy your mammogram and probably high five his boys at the bar later that night as he brags about ‘touching titties’ at work earlier that day.

Donald Trump is the poster child for obesity.  The big fat poster child. Most department stores don’t own clothes in his size. I should mention, there’s nothing wrong with being the size of a sports utility vehicle. Eat your food, my man. We’re all going to die anyway. Enjoy your life. But why are we now pretending like Trump is an Adonis when he looks like he injects sweet and sour sauce directly into his veins.

239 pounds. Laugh out loud.

 

 

 

Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Donald Trump is actually 239 pounds so that I can make fun of how fat you probably are. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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