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New Orleans Saints Are Laundering Money Through Taysom Hill’s Contracts

Taysom Hill is an NFL “quarterback” for the New Orleans Saints the last 4 seasons who was just given a 4-year $120 million contract. He has thrown 4 career touchdown passes. $120 million. Drew Brees retired and the Saints turned around and gave Taysom Hill $120 million.

But this isn’t a real $120 million. It’s a fake contract that is voided each of the next 4 years and he’ll make zero of those dollars. Somehow by signing Hill to a $120 million deal, the Saints have saved around $7.5 million dollars of salary cap space. Ok.

The salary cap is a completely imaginary and arbitrary restriction that exists just to trick fans into believing that the reason their team isn’t winning is because they can’t afford to pay better and more talented players when in actuality they just rich cheap assholes who don’t want to waste any of their immense fortunes to make you people happy.

Gayle Benson is the owner of the New Orleans Saints and I can’t help but think these Taysom Hill contracts are some devious way of flipping dirty money into legal taxable IRS-friendly contracts on the books.

Every TV show is about drug dealers, bank robbers and gang members so I am an expert in the field of Monday laundering at this point. I mean, Marty Byrde talks about it NONSTOP on Ozark. Like, an insane amount of his very public discussions involve the words ‘cleaning money’.

There’s no reason why Taysom Hill’s name should ever be associated with $140 million. There’s no way the NFL should allow teams to just give out fake 9 figure deals that are actually worth nothing. What’s Gayle Benson hiding? I need access to the books. There needs to be an investigation into what is going on here.

Taysom Hill is a third string quarterback with 4 career touchdown passes and he has $140 million. Whether it’s real or Monopoly money, fuck that.

 

TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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