NBA Power Rankings: Kevin Durant is a Bitch and Markelle Fultz Will Sue You

The second NBA Power Rankings of the season have ARRIVED. A lot has changed in a week. We have teammates calling teammates ‘bitches’. We have John Wall screaming at his head coach in practice while Dwight Howard is swiping right on Grindr.

 

Here are the NBA Power Rankings:

 

30. Golden State Warriors

The Golden State Warriors are dead, Draymond Green killed them. “You’re a bitch and you know you’re a bitch”. Steph Curry leaves for one week and the team crumbles to dust. I’m celebrating their destruction like it’s fucking New Year’s Eve. Popping champagne and trying to make out with anyone in arm’s length.

My favorite thing about Draymond calling out Durant is that Draymond is having the worst season of his NBA career. He’s shooting 22% from the 3-point line, 66% from the free throw line with 3.3 turnovers per game. Draymond is the worst player on the Warriors and he’s screaming that they don’t need Durant. I support this asshole move fully.

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