San Francisco 49ers linebacker Marcus Rush (44) knocks the ball out of Denver Broncos quarterback Mark Sanchez (6) during the second quarter August 20, 2016 at Sports Authority Field at Mile High Stadium. (Photo By John Leyba/The Denver Post)

Mark Sanchez Update: Still Sucks

There is absolutely nothing that Mark Sanchez loves more than turning over the football. It’s literally his favorite thing on planet Earth. He goes to bed dreaming about fumbling the football. When he wakes up he lays in bed for an extra hour just thinking about all of the interceptions he’s going to throw in practice later that day.

Over the weekend, Sanchez fumbled the football twice in field goal range against the San Francisco 49ers. Can’t change,¬†won’t change. With Peyton Manning retiring to do all of the HGH his little heart desires and Brock Osweiler filling in the role as next mediocre Houston Texan quarterback, Sanchez had the chance to really make his mark. Was that a pun? I hate me.

Sanchez decided to take this opportunity to remind the world that he should be holding clipboards on the sideline forever. Sanchez has the pocket awareness of a blind paraplegic. Sanchez makes Paxton Lynch look like John Elway. I would not be shocked if Sanchez was currently fapping to highlights of his old fumbles.



Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Mark Sanchez is the worst quarterback ever. Also, go ahead and give Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here.




Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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