lonzo ball denise

Lonzo Ball and His Soon To Be Ex Girlfriend Are Expecting a Child

The Los Angeles Lakers point guard and his longtime girlfriend, Denise Garcia, are expecting their first child together, according to TMZ Sports. The report states that Garcia is four months along in her pregnancy, though there’s no word yet on whether it’s a boy or girl.

(TheScore)

Lonzo’s pull out game is atrocious. This is what happens when you get drafted onto a super young NBA team and there are no veterans there to put their arm around your shoulder and say ‘always wear a condom’.

Lonzo Ball’s life is complete chaos. His mother is recovering from having a stroke. His brothers live in fucking Lithuania now. His father is at war with the president of the United States. The Los Angeles Lakers are tanking but they don’t have a first-round draft pick so there is no benefit to losing.

Annnddd now he went and got some random broad from Chino Hills pregnant. What a sucker. Gets one NBA contract and is already trapped by the local hometown girl who was nice to him before he could make a jump shot.

Lonzo Ball is 365 days from being a burnout and an amazing ESPN 30 For 30 Series about ‘what could have been’ before the child support and paying millions after Big Baller Brand lawsuits when those shoes fall to pieces.

#RIPLonzo

When Lonzo inevitably dumps you for some chick on Love and Hip Hop, sup?

 

 

Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you can’t wait to see this kid playing in Lithuania in like, 6 years. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

venom trailer

Watch The First Venom Trailer And Ask Yourself ‘Where The Fuck Is Venom?”

isaiah thomas los angeles lakers

Cleveland Cavaliers Trade Isaiah Thomas AND 1st Round Draft Pick To Los Angeles Lakers For a Subway Sandwich and a Metro Card