Kim Ng Just Put The Glass Ceiling In a Figure Four Leg Lock

The Miami Marlins have hired Kim Ng, the first female GM in North American sports history which is absolutely insane. There are two ways we can look at this signing. You can say it’s been 15 years since Ng interviewed for a GM position with the Dodgers back in 2005.

Or, you can say this is the first woman to be hired in the 93 years that a ‘general manager’ has existed in American sports. Either way, it makes no fucking sense that it’s taken this long for a woman to land this job.

But let’s focus on Kim Ng specifically because I’m not going to pretend to know about the women that deserved this job but in the 50’s but I assure you these women have existed over the course of the last 93 years and weren’t even close to getting the job.

Ng herself, is overqualified for the role. She was the assistant GM for the New York Yankees from 1998 to 2001. The team won 3 World Series Championships. She helped put together a dynasty and it took her 11 years to finally get hired as a GM.

She started her career as a 21-year old intern for the White Sox front office in 1990 before being hired full time a year later. That’s 30 years of experience that she needed in order to get this job. If you haven’t grasped how gross this is here’s a cute little fun fact: in 2015, the Milwaukee Brewers hired David Stearns as their GM. Stearns was 30 years old. Ng had 30 years of experience before she got a GM job. Stearns was on Earth for 30 years and leapfrogged ahead of her.

I know we’re supposed to be celebrating this historic achievement and round of applause to Kim Ng for sticking around and continuing the interview process knowing that some poli science nerd from Harvard that’s young enough to be her dorky son is going to have a better chance at getting a job opening than she is.

Can’t fully celebrate without addressing how straight-up shitty it is that Ng had to wait this long.

kim ng

I mean, look how cool she looks on a baseball field. Most GMs look like they’d be terrified of catching a pop up and homegirl looks like she’d climb the ball and rob a homer. I’m 1000% in hiring people who look cool which again exposes the fact that men believe women don’t belong in men’s sports.

And once again, before we celebrate, it’s impossible to not point out that she’s taking over the Miami Marlins. I do believe that this ownership group is going to give her a fair shot but at the end of the day, the Marlins are most likely going to lose a lot of games as they are restricted by their inability to match the spending of teams like the Dodgers and Yankees.

If I know wealthy old men like I know I know wealthy old men, Kim Ng’s potential failure is going to give them any reason to never let another woman have that position again.

Thankfully, Kim Ng is built for this shit. It’s a brilliant hire and she’ll crush it just off the strength of playing the New York Mets multiple times a year. That’s like, 18 guaranteed wins off rip.

Congrats to our Asian queen.




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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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