Kim Jong Un Now Has a Nuke Button But Donald Trump Has a ‘Bigger’ One Soooo….We’re All Going To Die

Kim Jong Un’s annual New Year’s address involved heaps of fake applause and grandstanding with a chilling piece of (possibly true) information — North Korea’s nuclear arsenal was ready, active, and had the entire United States in its sites.

“The entire mainland of the U.S. is within the range of our nuclear weapons and the nuclear button is always on the desk of my office,” the North Korean leader told his people. “They should accurately be aware that this is not a threat but a reality.”


Life was good. We were so care free. All of us were just minding our own business listening to Bodak Yellow and watching those kids from Stranger Things grow up. Annndddd now Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un are going to murder all of us because they are flashing each other their nuke buttons and trying to prove who has a bigger one. Life was good.

The worst part about Donald Trump provoking Kim Jong Un is that all of his supporters love this shit. It’s why they voted for him. People thought Barack Obama was a pussy for ignoring North Korea. Wellll North Korea didn’t even have electricity a few years ago. Now that they are being motivated by their hate of Trump, all of sudden they FINALLY have nuclear weapons. This is why you don’t provoke maniacs.

I reallyyy want to know what happens with Rey and Kylo-Ren. I don’t mind nuclear fallout. I can maneuver my way in a Mad Max and/or Snowpiercer world. I’m smart and good looking. I’ll be king. I just need these two men to wait until the Skywalker movies are done and then yea hit the Nuke Button or whatever.

Life was good.



Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think these assholes are going to smash the nuke button by the end of the day. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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