Joe Biden’s Student Loan Plan is Horseshit

Before the election, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer proposed a potential $50,000 student loan debt erasure for every American via executive order in Joe Biden’s first 100 days in office.

With the average student loan debt for the class of 2019 $30,062, this plan could’ve rejuvenated an entire generation of young(ish) people who simply cannot afford to settle down and create a family because their entire paychecks go back to paying for a degree that 30 years ago would’ve placed them in the career field that they actually went to school for instead of now where you graduate and you beg for a minimum wage job so you can afford dollar menu meals and parking tickets.

Enter Joe Biden, the geriatric asshole dedicated to due the absolute fucking least but be super kind about it because apparently all of Trump’s terrible country-destroying policies weren’t the problem. It was his mean attitude.

Here is Biden’s nonsensical plan:

In answer to a question at a Monday press conference, Biden repeated his support for a provision passed as part of the HEROES Act, which the Democratic-controlled House updated on Oct. 1. The provision calls for the federal government to pay off up to $10,000 in private, nonfederal student loans for “economically distressed” borrowers. Biden specifically highlighted “people … having to make choices between paying their student loan and paying the rent,” and said the debt relief “should be done immediately.”

None of these words are good.

Let’s start with $10,000. Who exactly is this for? Oh cool, the government is paying me back for about, 5 weeks of one semester freshman year. Yessss, I can finally purchase my dream home and stop living with 17 roommates because Biden offered to pay me back for my college textbooks. Thank you.

I’ve already gone on rants in the past about means testing and how disgusting they are to include in relief plans but once again, the Democrats continue to play the hits. You must be ‘economically distressed’ in order to access this $10,000 that you can probably only find by accidentally stumbling upon like, page 7 of a Google search on a website made in the 90s.

You either offer student loan debt relief or don’t. I should not have to prove to you have poor I am. I shouldn’t have to lie about my parents’ income or tell you the size of the shoe I live inside in order to get crumbs from the government.

This is going to be the entire Biden administration so get ready for me to be screaming into my laptop a lot as Biden smiles and Kamala dances with Desus and Mero or whatever as they throw dollar bills from their castle as us little people like Mardi Gras creeps throwing beads out of their hotel rooms to see saggy drunk tits.

Global pandemic that saw record levels of death, record levels of unemployment and record levels of homelessness in America. All we got was $1,200. Once. We were told to vote for the ‘good guys’. And they don’t give a shit about us either. Here’s $10k if you tap dance for it.

Burn America to the ground.



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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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