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Jared Dudley Can Never Speak For The Remainder of Time

Jared Dudley is dead, Ben Simmons murdered him.

After the Sixers took Game 2 over the Brooklyn Nets, Jared Dudley ad Ben Simmons started a beef. Dudley casually mentioned that Ben Simmons was ‘average’ in the halfcourt and Ben Simmons took offense to those words.

Whether Dudley intended to take shots at Simmons or if he was just giving an honest criticism of his game, what happened in Game 3 was no one’s fault but his own.

Ben Simmons scored 31 points on 11-for-13 shooting with 9 assists and 4 rebounds. Jared Dudley had zero points on 0-for-2 shooting. Go home, Jared.

Now, there are a lot of people refusing to give Simmons credit for dominating Game 3. ‘Dudley is a bench player. Simmons is supposed to play better’


These are the same people who would openly mock Ben Simmons if he ended up getting outscored by Jared Dudley. Let’s have some consistency. Celebrate players when they dominate games. There is no such thing as saying that a player is ‘supposed’ to be great. You either play well or you don’t and when you play well, you deserve praise.

And when you play like Jared Dudley, you deserve to never speak again, which I’ve personally been waiting years for. Dudley has been talking reaaaal spicy on his Twitter account this year and I’ve had enough.

Dudley is clearly attempting to maneuver his way into the media and if you know me at all then you know how I feel about retired athletes automatically snatching up broadcasting jobs away from, ya know, actual broadcasters and journalist who went to school for broadcasting and journalism.

But there is nothing to worry about now. Jared Dudley is dead. Ben Simmons killed him.

Oh and real quick. Ben Simmons, the man who is ‘average’ in the half court shot 9-for-11 in the half court. Get sick Kid Mero OUT of here. It’s slow for you, JARED.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.


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