If ESPN Didn’t Exist Anymore, Would It Even Matter?

More layoffs are coming for ESPN, the second time this year that the network has had to reduce its staff across its many platforms. The sports network reportedly wants to trim $80 million this time around, which sets up another painful process for many in Bristol and abroad.

And, according to a report, those that remain but don’t work in Bristol will be flying in to do some training regarding the network’s new social media policy. In an effort to avoid snafus that get conservative bloggers upset, Sports Illustrated‘s Richard Deitch reported on Tuesday that ESPN would bring its entire editorial staff to Bristol as part of an educational explanation of the company’s new policy.



Sooo ESPN plans to fire even more employees any day now and everyone that somehow makes it past these roster cuts has to fly into Bristol for a wack ass social media training seminar like they’re journalism undergrad students from Northwestern.

A couple of weeks ago ESPN brought Sportscenter to Snapchat and after watching one ‘episode’ I can say it’s the lamest thing I ever watched. It tries so hard to be funny but they totally lack the talent to be funny and with social media training seminars, their employees aren’t even allowed to be funny.

They built their brand on Sportscenter and providing exclusive nightly clips and recaps of every sporting event but it’s 2017 and I can simply scroll through my Twitter timeline to see literally everything that happened that night. I don’t need to stay up and watch Scott Van Pelt who looks like Jack Skellington with a tie on.

If ESPN didn’t exist anymore, would it even matter?

What does this channel have that we really need? The NFL intentionally gives this network the worst games on Monday Night and financially, ESPN can’t even afford to renew their NFL contract because apparently, that would lead to more layoffs.

How are they laying off so many employees every 6 months? Are NBA writers making 7 figures out here? There’s a Major League Soccer writer out there living in an MC Hammer mansion trying to sell the shit out of their home because they know they’re about to get fired and the jig is up.

At the end of the day, ESPN’s biggest problem is that it’s 2017 and no one watches Sportscenter anymore which runs all day every day. They should be developing individual shows around their talent but they don’t allow their talent to shine. Anytime someone’s star shines above the brand, they’re gone. Colin Cowherd, Dan Patrick and Bill Simmons should all have hour long shows instead of replaying First Take three times a day. ESPN should be encouraging Jemele Hill to be even more outspoken because it drives eyes to their network.

ESPN is living in the stone age of sports programming and there’s nothing I want to watch less than Dan LeBetard making fun of his dad’s Spanish accent. Hard pass on that nonsense.



Sidenote: Where are the boobs? Wayyy too many guys over in Bristol. I’m not saying that boobs would suddenly help them turn a profit but like, why not find out, ya know.







Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think ESPN will be dead by this time next year. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

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