I just sat down and watched a FOUR HOUR doc about Hillary Clinton’s life and somehow know less about the woman than I did prior to having watched it.
The entire Hillary Clinton documentary is meant to add context to the 2016 presidential election that saw fall flat on her face and provide us with eight years of Donald Trump, an old sassy queen that is watching the American population dwindle as a virus takes our lives while he hangs with Alex Rodriguez and the fucking My Pillow guy.
All of Hillary’s interviews are filled with canned laughter and weak shrugs as she claims that people think she has no emotions while continuing to talk about important aspects of her life with no emotions.
Hillary Clinton is one of the most tragic figures in modern political history. The problem is, she and this documentary refuse to acknowledge that. Instead, we are supposed to take her story as aspirational and inspiring.
Hillary is a loser. And that’s totally fine. But we are waterboarded with this idea that she’s some sort of conquerer. She’s not. She takes L’s left and right.
She graduated from Yale Law School and was a member of the impeachment staff during Richard Nixon’s Watergate scandal. She was without a doubt one of the most successful women in the country in her 20’s and basically gave up a future of doing whatever the hell she wanted to do in order to marry Jeffrey Epstein’s buddy, Bill, and move to Arkansas.
She had to take Bill’s last name and pretend to be a dumb housewife just so that he could become governor because her insistence to maintain her own identity and intelligence made Arkansas voters uncomfortable.
She sacrificed years of her own potential success for her husband who was in the midst of a TWELVE YEAR affair with Gennifer Flowers.
But again, Hillary doesn’t allow us to see the human tragedy in this woman giving everything to a man only to be shit on by that man. She gives us the political reasons behind her decisions and we’re left leaving with the same narrative about her life that we walked into the doc with: she’s cold and calculating.
Do you want to know why Hillary Clinton isn’t president? Because she’s a woman.
She ran a campaign against Donald Trump where she begged to debate ‘policy’ claiming that Trump had none but at the end of the day, neither did she. Centrist Democrats don’t believe in anything. She had nothing to offer voters outside of making history as the first female president.
Sure, she was the most qualified for the job but with the amount of time she’s spent in Washington, it was easy for Trump to paint her as the face of how unresponsive and out of touch the government is.
The most honest Hillary gets is when she’s speaking about her opponent in the primaries, Bernie Sanders. “Nobody likes him. Nobody wants to work with him. He got nothing done.” It is obvious that her genuine hate for Bernie isn’t because his ideas are too radical or ‘impossible’. She hates Bernie because she thinks Bernie is tricking voters with his plans.
She is so separated from what American voters want and feel that she can’t fathom the fact that we are aware of how revolutionary his ideas are and we fucking want that. You know who loves Hillary? Comfortable white ladies who want to see themselves represented on a new $5 bill someday.
And the irony of her whining about Bernie Sanders is that as First Lady, she attempted to pass universal health care reform. She was promptly laughed off the face of the political landscape and treated like some dumb broad attempting to play government with her husband and his grown-up friends.
She hates Bernie because he can run on universal health care and no one disregards him like they would a woman. They disregard him for other reasons but certainly not gender-related.
And do you know what lesson she learned from being laughed out of the room in the 90s? Become a boring moderate with no unique ideas. That’s how you win elections. You prove to voters that you are an industrious level-headed technocrat and you don’t rock the boat.
Oh, and you completely misread Barack Obama’s campaign. Barack tricked us all on ‘hope’ and ‘change’. That’s why he won. That and because he ran against a corpse and Sarah Palin’s vanishing IQ.
But Hillary left out of hope shit and must’ve thought Barack won because he’s black and told herself ‘Oh, voters want to make history. They voted for a brown person so they’ll vote for a woman’ and provided nothing outside of her xx chromosomes and her dedication to maintaining the status quo.
Another big fat L.
We should feel bad for this woman. We should look up to her ability to get punched in the face so many times and continue to stand up against bullshit email investigations constant rejection.
This Hillary Clinton documentary was such a waste of time and to this day, Hillary has no perspective or insight of her own career.
The woman who gave everything to her husband while her husband was banging interns in the White House and when she finally had a shot at the championship belt herself, the entire political dynamics of the country shifted and she lost to a special needs tiny-dicked obese-yet-frail game show host.
Only a real asshole would attempt to shield us from that catastrophic reality and pretend as if she’s been an invulnerable undefeated Amazon warrior and the fucking nerve for that Hillary Clinton documentary to end with a montage of all the young progressive women that won House seats this past year knowing damn well that they are all political adversaries and their success has absolutely nothing to do with Hillary: the biggest loser.
Dear Hulu, you owe me 4 hours.