So we finally got the first teaser trailer for Star Wars Episode IX and as exciting it was to see Rey do literally anything and Carrie Fisher still holding it down for the Resistance, the biggest moment of that trailer was Palpatine’s laugh at the end.
Now, I’m sure we all remember the last time we saw Palpatine, he got thrown off the top rope By Darth Vader into a reactor shaft and electrocuted. Usually that would result in death yet here we are three movies later and he appears to have a major role in the finale of the Skywalker story.
So how is Emperor Palpatine still alive?
Well, a firm hard and fast rule is if you don’t actually see the body then chances are, they’re not really dead. Obi-Wan Kenobi sliced Darth Maul in half and Maul shows up in the Han Solo movie like that shit never even happened.
Sure Palpatine, ya know, burst into flames, so did Anakin and he ruled the galaxy for another couple of decades after that. So let me run through a couple of my theories real quick. Walk with me.
- Supreme Leader Snoke is Palpatine: It has yet to be explained where Snoke came from and how he knows anything about the dark side of the
force. How is he teaching Kylo Ren? Darth Sidious and Anakin were the endof the sith. Where was Snoke hiding out while the Empire was going down?
It would make sense that Palpatine was resurrected in a new body which would perhaps also explain why Snoke is such a weird looking motherfucker. He is not some normal man. He is Palpatine.
2. Palpatine never died:
In Revenge of the Sith, Palpatine tells Anakin the story of Darth Plagueis The Wise and his ability to manipulate
I also want to point out the possibility that Snoke is Darth Plagueis which was a common rumor heading into The Last Jedi and Snoke got cut in half before we really learned anything about him but now that Palpatine’s back, we can finally get to the bottom of what is actually happening here.
And real quick, Revenge of the Sith is better than you all acted. Go back and re-watch it. It’s a good movie. I swear.
3. Dumb movie stuff: As much as I love wildly speculating about Star Wars movies after 2 minutes of trailer footage, at the end of the day, the answer is always way less complex than my dumb theories are.
Chances are, he’s going to just appear as some force ghost or he’s going to spin around in an office chair and say ‘I’ve been waiting for you’ and there will be no explanation. Awesome.
sidenote: the more I write ‘Rise of the Skywalker’ the more that shit sounds incredibly dumb. Stop letting JJ Abrams name things.
- Megan Rapinoe Winning The Ballon d’Or Shows Everything That’s Wrong With Women’s Soccer
- Black Widow Is About To Be The Worst Part of the Black Widow Movie
- Josh Allen Deserves The 2019 NFL MVP
- The 4 Best Players Left on the NBA Trade Market
- After Watching The Irishman, I No Longer Want To Hear Any Nonsense Martin Scorsese Has To Say About Marvel Movies