eli manning

How Bad Does Eli Manning Have To Be For The Giants To Get Him Off The Fucking Field?

The New York Giants stink. They are quite easily the least talented football team in the NFL and every week I have to open up my laptop and try not to write a 2,000 word article about all of the awful decisions that new GM, Dave Gettleman, made in his brief and terrible reign in New York.

This week, let’s point the finger at Eli Manning. Yes, the Giants defense doesn’t exist and this team has a grand total of zero wide receivers on the roster, which is a strange way to build a team but again, fuck Gettleman.

But it all begins and ends with your QB1.

Look at this fucking interception. A deep pass thrown at no one in particular just sailing over everyone’s heads and directly into the arms of a defender because Eli can’t throw deep anymore. He just knows the ball has to go far and chucks it as hard as he dead elderly arm can throw and Odell Beckham can no longer save him from this nonsense.

There is no reason why Eli continues to be a starting quarterback in the NFL.

It’s going downhill for the two-time Super Bowl Champion. And what makes things worse, the Giants drafted a quarterback in the first round and he is rotting on the sidelines watching the worst football on planet Earth.

Stop telling me you’re following the Patrick Mahomes model. Do you want to know why they waited a year before letting Mahomes start? Because the Kansas City Chiefs were a perennial playoff team and Alex Smith is objectively better than Eli Manning.

The fuck is Daniel Jones learning sitting behind Eli? How to get your passes swatted down at the line of scrimmage? How to throw a screen pass at your running back’s feet?

Dating back to last season, Eli has now lost 5 straight games and has only won 5 games total since 2017. Why is he still around? Because he won a Super Bowl back when Daniel Jones began puberty and just discovered Kristina Rose videos.

Among all active quarterbacks, Eli Manning has the most interceptions. He has led the league in interceptions more often than not. He stinks. He’s always stunk. But now he’s 700 years old and Daniel Jones looked like a phenom in the preseason.

So what does Eli Manning have to do to be benched?

This front office is unpredictable as hell. Damon Harrison was an outstanding citizen, a leader of the team and one of the best defensive linemen in the entire league so naturally, he was traded at the deadline last season for a slice of pizza.

Eli Manning could throw for 500 yards, 6 touchdowns each of the next 6 games. The Giants could win all 6 of those games. And that’s when the Giants would bench him for Daniel Jones.

Being a Giants fan is going to be miserable for awhile. Pray for me.


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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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