Houston Rockets Snuck Into Los Angeles Clippers Locker Room After The Game To Beat The Shit Out of Austin Rivers

Several security guards were present outside the Rockets’ locker room Monday night following a 113-102 loss to the Clippers that got heated on the court. Citing anonymous NBA sources, ESPN reported several Rockets players headed toward the Clippers’ locker room afterward, seeking a confrontation, but were escorted away by security before anything got physical.

(NY Post)


Soo before we jump into what brought the cops into the Clippers locker room on Monday night we must first rewind back to a simpler time in the NBA. Back when Chris Paul was on the Los Angeles Clippers after David Stern canceled a trade that would send him to the Lakers because David Stern is the puppetmaster and all of this is his fault.

Paul played in Los Angeles for 6 seasons and during that time, the Clippers never advanced past the second round of the playoffs. He and Blake Griffin never managed to stay healthy enough to do any real damage.

This past summer, Chris Paul demanded a trade to play alongside the gawd, James Harden, in Houston. Upon arriving in Houston, it may or may not have been leaked that Chris Paul couldn’t stand Doc Rivers and his son, Austin, who only has a job in the NBA because his father is the coach of the team.

Here’s what former Clipper, Glen Davis has to say about Austin Rivers:

Let’s just assume that Chris Paul agrees with this.

And now we’re ready for Monday Night Raw.

If you missed the game here’s the quick rundown: Blake Griffin was being a dick all night. You know you’re being an asshole when Mike D’Antoni straight up yells ‘FUCK YOU’ in your face and is ready to throw hands.

Perhaps the Clippers had a strategy to send Blake out there to get under Chris Paul’s skin. Perhaps Griffin is just an asshole. Either way, it worked. The Rockets were HEATED. And then after the game, the Houston Rockets did what the Houston Rockets do best: Goon Shit.

HAHAHAHA YOOOO. Chris Paul really led the squad through the old Staples Arena secret tunnels into the back door of the Clippers locker room to put his hands on the coach’s son. This is the most hilarious thing I’ve ever read. CP3 really walked Trevor Ariza, James Harden and Gerald Green through the catacombs to pop up under the floor of the home team’s locker room to catch a body.

I love the Houston Rockets so much. ? GOOOONS.

Let’s not forget that James Harden hired people to murder Moses Malones Jr. at the local strip club over the summer. Let’s not forget that Trevor Ariza showed up at a fan’s house to fight because he was talking shit on Twitter. The best part about this is that Gerald Green has only been on the roster for 3 weeks and he’s already following Chris Paul after he pulls a book from the shelf to reveal a trap door leading to Austin Rivers.

My man, Chris Paul, sent Clint Capela to the front door to distract the Clippers while he led the Ocean’s Eleven crew into the secret passageways like Tyrion Lannister sneaking into King’s Landing last season. Lantern in hand. GOOOOOONS.

But at the end of the day, nothing beats Jerry West, the NBA LOGO, storming the court to choke slam someone.

Happy Martin Luther King Day.




Thanks for reading. Leave a comment if you want to see The Houston Rockets vs. The Los Angeles Clippers at Wrestlemania this year. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.


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