The Boston Celtics are losing basketball games left and right. They can’t get enough of it. There is nothing the Boston Celtics love right now more than getting blown out.
There are reports and player’s being quoted about the lack of fun this team is playing. And it’s evident. No one on the sidelines ever seems happy for their teammates success. Even tanking teams at the bottom of the standings jump for joy when one of their guys has a monster dunk. Jayson Tatum could dunk on Joel Embiid and Kyrie Irving will look bored.
There are a lot of takes and theories going around attempting to explain why Boston is on a 3-game losing streak including back-to-back blowout losses in which they were competitive at any point of those games.
The most popular theory is that last season, when Gordon Hayward and Kyrie Irving were out with injuries, the younger guys stepped up and were a quarter away from beating the Cleveland Cavaliers and actually making the NBA Finals with a team of role players.
And now this season, Hayward and Irving are back and guys like Tatum, Jaylen Brown, Marcus Smart and Terry Rozier have to give back those playoffs minutes and most importantly, those shot attempts.
Understandable take. I could see that being a problem in like, October. But it’s February and the rotation has stabilized. Everyone should know and understand their role at this point. I’d like to think that Terry Rozier gets that Kyrie is better than him.
There’s also a theory that Kyrie is at fault here and that the roster resents him, which makes a little more sense. Kyrie had a room full of Celtics ownership and season ticket holders where he proclaimed that he is definitely re-signing with Boston and now if you ask him, he’ll roll his eyes and say ‘ask me when free agency starts’. That’s not quite ‘having the same energy’ as the kids say.
Boston is also 9-2 when Kyrie doesn’t play including 6 straight wins with him out of the lineup and 5 straight losses with him back in the lineup which includes a loss to the Los Angeles Lakers and the Lakers aren’t a basketball team as much as they’re a Craigslist missed connections ad for Anthony Davis.
I could get behind the idea that the team sort of resents the guy who is constantly talking down to them because he won a championship once and they haven’t. One time I worked with a girl who called me ‘sweetheart’ and ‘honey’. She was 5 years younger than me. That shit was infuriating. I’m not your son.
But here is what’s really going on. Here is the real reason why the Boston Celtics aren’t having fun:
They’re all weirdos.
Kyrie Irving is a troll that says the Earth is flat while Jaylen Brown would be a college professor if he weren’t an NBA player. Can you imagine the arguments they get into with Kyrie saying that the moon landing was fake and Jaylen giving the exact physics behind the Appolo.
Last season, Marcus Smart broke his hand punching something because he didn’t like what his ex-girlfriend posted on Instagram. That is a level or horny and hothead that is a nightmare on road trips. Add Marcus Morris to the list of absolute wildcards.
Al Horford seems as fun as an empty spiral notebook. And Gordon Hayward? That gamer from rural Indiana?? How much can he talk about League of Legends and Minecraft before you put your headphones on or decide to just drive to the away game in Denver?
Do you want to know why the Boston Celtics aren’t having fun?
Because everyone on that team is a fucking weirdo. You go hang out with Aaron Baynes. I dare you.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think the Boston Celtics are just a bunch of freaks. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Follow on Instagram so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.