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Noah Syndergaard Has Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease, Yoenis Cespesdes is Facing a Potential Career Ending Leg Injury and Jeurys Familia Is Traded For Magic Beans…Lol @Mets

What Happened?

The New York Mets on Saturday traded closer Jeurys Familia to the Oakland Athletics, both teams announced on Saturday.

Oakland sent minor league pitcher Bobby Wahl and infielder Will Toffey plus $1 million in international bonus pool slot money to New York in the deal.



There is a level of optimism that most teams and fans experience following the All-Star break. It’s a chance to hit the reset button on the season, take a deep breath and decide whether you are ready to make a playoff push or sell for the future.

The New York Mets came out of the All-Star and lost their second best starting pitcher to a disease from the Middle Ages. Hand, Foot and Mouth disease is so rare that it doesn’t even have a real name. It’s just a list of the things that hurt when you have it. Would not be surprised if it’s called Noah Syndergaard Disease by the end of the week.

Yoenis Cespedes comes back from the DL, hits a home run, and then immediately gets the diagnoses that the bones in his legs have grown directly into his achilles and he needs to have surgery to fix BOTH heels so he can, you know, WALK.

Do the New York Mets have a training staff?

David Wright is on his deathbed right now because the Mets trainers can’t get him to stand upright. The Mets have a constant revolving door of players going on and off the disabled list and they allowed Cespedes to go back out there on the field with his legs about to shatter into pieces.

But not to worry. The New York Mets bullshit far surpasses just their training staff. The Mets also don’t seem to have scouts or any sort of front office capable of acquiring great talent. By all reports, the Mets traded away one of the best relief pitchers on the market to the Oakland A’s in exchange for guys who won’t ever really make an impact on their major league squad. Dope.

Remember when the New York Mets started the season 11-1 and everyone thought the city belonged to the Mets? Laugh out loud.







Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you genuinely feel bad for the New York Mets. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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