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Getting CC Sabathia Back Solves Literally Zero of the Yankees Problems

CC Sabathia BACK. Let’s GOOOOO. Pop Bottles. The future Hall of Famer returns to make his first start in his final season of his career. What a huge moment.

Buuuut let’s all take a step back and relax with this narrative that the season begins today. In what world does the fifth starter in the rotation truly impact the course of a team’s season?

CC can go out there and throw 5 scoreless innings. And that’ll be mega cool or whatever but it won’t matter at all if Chad Green and Zach Britton jog out there and give up hit after hit after hit.

Does CC Sabathia coming back suddenly take at-bats away from minor leaguers like Gio Urshela, Mike Tauchman, Tyler Wade and Austin Romine? No? You mean those bums still have to keep grounding out to short even though CC is BACK?? Strange.

CC is the unquestioned leader of this pitching staff but his return to pitching doesn’t suddenly give JA Happ and James Paxton control over the strike zone. Greg Bird isn’t suddenly going to remember how to hit a baseball because CC pitched the top of that inning.

He’s not Luis Severino. He’s 38 years old.

I should probably mention that I’m glad CC is back and blah blah but let’s be realistic about this. CC wasn’t one of the guys on the Injured List that this team needed back.

If Jacoby Ellsbury walked through the door right now with his bat in hands ready to ball out, no one would bat an eye.

The Yankees need Severino, Dellin Betances, Giancarlo Stanton and Miguel Andujar back. CC Sabathia could’ve retired over the summer and this team’s projected wins and losses wouldn’t have been affected at all.

Welcome back, though. *fake smile that you give when someone walks into an already crowded elevator*

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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

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