We made it to the end of the season 7. We lost some real ones along the way but the show has made a full pivot from ‘who is going to sit in the Iron Throne?’ to ‘how do we defeat the Night King?’ which we’ll get to later but first we start with the family I ride with the hardest, House Lannister.
This episode will for sure be used for Lena Headley’s Emmy showcase. Cersei’s reaction to seeing the zombie presented to her, Cersei’s inability to execute lil bro Tyrion, Cersei’s complete vulnerability when Jaime walks off to go fight monsters. Cersei V. Everybody.
This entire season is pretty much every character brushing the dirt of 6 seasons of war off their shoulders and reuniting with everyone else who managed to survive this long. Wasn’t really begging for a Bron and Podrick reunion but I didn’t mind it.
There were a lot of great little moments such as Brienne and The Hound bonding over their shared interest in Arya’s future like they are bitter divorced parents who have to decide what private school to send their little girl to.
But the problem with these little moments is that they no longer matter when zombies are approaching. Jaime himself says “This isn’t about noble houses. This is about the living and the dead.” Sooo then why should I care that Cersei and Euron are planning on recruiting the Golden Company from Essos to reclaim lands when Daenerys takes North? These little details have become completely irrelevant.
All of the irrelevant nonsense comes to a head when Bran narrates the most boring exposition about Jon Snow’s lineage over scenes of his brother banging Daenerys. It was both creepy and totally unnecessary. Jon Snow is actually Aegon Targaryen. Who gives a shit?
Was this supposed to be a big reveal? The internet exists. We’ve known Jon was a Targaryen since like, day one. That scene was like the ending of Westworld when they revealed that Jimmy was actually the Man in Black as if everyone with a wifi connection hadn’t already figured that out after the premiere.
But the problem wasn’t revealing that Jon Snow is a Targaryen while he is balls deep inside of his aunt. The problem is that we established all season long that houses and thrones no longer matter. It’s all about stopping the dead from taking over. The Night King has a fucking DRAGON now. So what if Jon is the rightful heir?
Eh, we get to see dragons fighting next season. Who am I to complain? Plus, we got to see Littlefinger almost cry as he begged for his life. Shout out to Game of Thrones for making us all believe that Arya and Sansa were annoying siblings arguing like little girls when in actuality they had it all figured out thanks to the Three-Eyed Raven…whatever that means.
I reckon my only real problem is that The Dragon and The Wolf wasn’t 90 straight minutes of Jon and Daenerys humping. Just seems like a real missed opportunity, ya know. Fingers crossed for next season.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you’re going to miss Game of Thrones for the next 18 months. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.