kurt rambis

Fuck Kurt Rambis

The Los Angeles Lakers were moments away from signing Tyronn Lue as their new head coach until Kurt Rambis and his wife, who are apparently special advisors to Lakers team president Jeannie Buss because they are friends who get wine drunk together on the weekends and occasionally join forces to make awful basketball decisions.

The Rambis’s made wild demands of Lue including forcing him to add Jason Kidd as his assistant coach. Jason Kidd is a power hungry sociopath who would get hired as an assistant on Monday and have Ty Lue fired by Friday after like, planting cocaine in his pockets at an airport or some shit.

The Lakers also only offered Ty Lue a 3-year contract thus robbing him of all job security once LeBron James leaves.

Ty Lue then rejected the offer which speaks volumes considering the fact that being the Lakers head coach is his dream job and no other franchise seems to be in a hurry to hire him and Lue chose indefinite unemployment over the chaos of Los Angeles.

In what world, on what planet, should the basketball opinions of Kurt Rambis be heard?

In 2009, the Minnesota Timberwolves hired Kurt Rambis as their head coach. He proceeded to win 15 games. The following season, he took a huge leap. He won 17 games.

In 2015 he was the interim head coach of the New York Knicks. He won 9 games thus bumping his career head coaching win-loss record to 65-164. 28% winning percentage.

Rambis can’t even run a Twitter account as he was caught liking porn tweets when he was the Knicks head coach. This weirdo followed an account called @GreatAssDaily. He’s making your basketball decisions? Mr. Great Ass Daily?

And his wife Linda, who looks like the friend who encourages you to have an affair and then guilts you about it afterward because she’s messy and wants everyone’s life to be as chaotic as hers and a guy she dated 35 years ago is a divorce attorney and she wants an excuse to call him again.

How does Kurt Rambis fail over and over and over and over again and continue to grow more powerful?

That’s obviously a rhetorical question. He’s a rich white guy with rich white friends in America. Every time he fails he gets a promotion. Donald Trump lost billions in the span of a decade and failed upwards into becoming president.

Kurt Rambis 2020.

Can’t wait til Rambis hires himself as the head coach and leads the Lakers to a tremendous 23-59 record and spoils another LeBron season. Just as the prophecy foretold.


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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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