dustin johnson brooks koepka

Dustin Johnson and Brooks Koepka Nearly Beat The Shit Out of Each Other At The Ryder Cup Which is Good News For The Sport of Golf

What Happened?

On Monday night multiple reports alleged that Dustin Johnson and Brooks Koepka had to be separated at a Ryder Cup party on Sunday night. Although Koepka’s representation has refuted this story, sources have confirmed to Golf Digest that an altercation did take place.

Specifically what happened to cause Johnson and Koepka to be separated is unclear. A source told Golf Digest that Paulina Gretzky, Johnson’s fiancee, was a central figure in the incident. Koepka’s girlfriend, Jena Sims, was also involved.

(Golf Digest)

 

Let’s goooooo. PGA Fight Club, I’m all the way in on this.

Everyone on ESPN and in sports media was pretending to care about the Ryder Cup, an event that Team USA hasn’t won in a full generation. It’s also a golf event which means it doesn’t actually matter and I had zero interest at all.

Tiger Woods had won a tournament the weekend prior so everyone was hyped for him to return to the Ryder Cup team. Again, I don’t care about an old man with a bad back, shady painkiller prescriptions and an insatiable appetite for diner waitresses playing golf, a sport that doesn’t allow people who look like me to even step onto the course.

But now we’ve got legitimate beefs and potential fisticuffs?

Golf has suddenly piqued my interest. Throw Wayne Gretzky’s daughter in the mix breaking up the fight and I might pay attention to the next PGA tournament.

Brooks Koepka won the PGA Championship and the US Open in the same year. Dustin Johnson also won 3 tourneys in 2018 as well. None of that shit matters.

Dustin Johnson was once suspended for failing a drug test with that sweet sweet cocaine in his system and he’s out here partying with his wife and daughter of the greatest hockey player of all time.

Oh, and it’s on sight next time he sees Brooks Koepka out in these streets. THIS is how golf should be promoting their sport. Tiger Woods is old news. Give me tall white dudes slap boxing in khakis with yacht rock playing in the background.

 

 

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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

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