Donald Trump’s Brother Died, Lolololololol

Donald Trump has a brother named Robert apparently or I should say, he used because Robert Trump is dead as hell now. This may sound incentive but it’s tough to give any shits about the Trump family when Donald himself has shown absolutely zero concern.

Personally, if I knew my siblings were on their death bed, I wouldn’t be answering the texts of a fucking former NFL kicker but perhaps that’s just me. People die every day. Especially in America where almost 200,000 people have died from a virus that the president has pretended doesn’t even really exist.

Jared Kushner has come out and said that this is a “a very tough moment for the president,” which is a lie but if it happens to be true then lolololololol. There are rumors that Robert Trump died of Coronavirus as an official cause of death was not released but there’s nothing better than an ironic Shakespearean death. Thousands upon thousands have lost loved ones due to COVID while Trump has been golfing and making states beg for financial and medical aid. Very happy to see his brother is no longer breathing. This is the best news we’ve received from the Trump administration maybe ever.

And I don’t want to hear anything from the Trump crowd condemning me for popping champagne here. I was told that life has risks and sometimes people die so let’s just open everything up and let us all sit on each other’s laps at college football games again so we can cheer for teenage boys to give each other concussions for a grand total of $0 dollars in their pockets.

The world is certainly a better place today than it was yesterday with one less Trump running around, Robert Trump’s last meaningful action was filling a retraining order against his niece Mary in an attempt to block her from releasing her tell-all book about growing up with the Trumps. Wow, we truly lost a good man. Bitch ass.

Also real quick, Donald Trump’s YOUNGER brother is 72-years old? And if he was running for president he’d be the youngest candidate?? Guys, we don’t have to live this way. We don’t need to elect men that are literally rotting before our eyes. We have zero self-respect as Americans.

RIP ya dead bitch.



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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

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