Andrew Yang’s 2020 presidential campaign has come to an obvious end after finding himself completely irrelevant in both Iowa and now New Hampshire. It’s safe to say he looked around and realized that he had to spend all of his time in parts of the country where parents pick their kids up from soccer practice with an opened bottle of whiskey in the cupholder and realized it wasn’t worth having Amy Klobuchar throwing staplers at him.
Yang went from a political nobody to still being a political nobody but man, did that guy got a lot of Twitter followers. Still can’t decide who enjoyed running for president more knowing damn well they were going to lose: Andrew Yang or Beto O’Rourke.
Beto was able to travel around the country and meet other Gen X-er’s who collect Misfits band tees as he does ollies on his prop skateboard. Yang spent most of his campaign praising the Brooklyn Nets culture thus preparing himself for his new podcast at The Ringer with Daryl Morey.
Can’t help but wonder what was even the purpose of his campaign. Donald Trump has opened the door for any self-proclaimed ‘businessman’ to believe that their next big endeavor ought to be running the United States of America because shrug.
Remember when Howard Schultz wanted to run for president because he like, made iced coffee popular in the 90s. It’s impossible to ignore the amount of money Michael Bloomberg is spending on campaign commercials. If you go 24 hours without seeing a Bloomberg ad than immediately shoot yourself in the head. Someone is in your head trying to incept you to make you sell your father’s company or some shit. Wake up and watch these bullshit Bloomberg ads.
Yang is a silicon valley techie whose MATH (Make America Think Harder) slogan and universal basic income idea provided us with unique talking points while totally being disregarded by everyone except Dave Chappelle.
Andrew Yang was the young substitute teacher that started the class by performatively crumbling up the lesson plan and shouting “KOBE” before shooting the paper ball 10 feet away from the garbage can.
Did Andrew Yang matter?
His universal income plan makes far more sense than Pete Buttigieg’s *checks notes* no plans.
With the economy becoming more and more automated and American’s losing their jobs to robots, a universal basic income is both necessary and surprisingly feasible. The purpose of automation is to make our lives more simple not to have us out here competing for jobs with Rosie from the Jetsons.
His abilities to come from nowhere and receive enough donation money needed to get dope stage seats for the Democratic Debates he wasn’t really apart of.
We can’t ignore that an Asian-American has never had this much success in a presidential election. There wasn’t even weird racism against him or at least not that I noticed but I haven’t been on Reddit in awhile so I could be mistaken.
But Andrew Yang can get the fuuuck out of here.
Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren plan on going to war with tech giants like Facebook and Amazon and Yang—coming from the world of tech—wanted to work ‘with’ these companies. Yes, all of these monopolies want nothing more than to restrict their own growth and profits. All it takes is a ‘come on, guys. I’m serious’ from Yang wearing a backward hat, a Jason Kidd New Jersey Nets jersey while doing vape tricks.
Yang just existed to make debates 30 minutes longer. Go vote for Bernie or Liz and ignore everyone else.
Are YOU an asshole? Subscribe below and receive the *FREE* checklist to find out sent directly to your inbox in seconds: