Darren Collison Throws His Name Into The 2020 Scammer of the Year Debate Early

The Los Angeles Lakers are desperate for depth in the backcourt. Their starting point guard is 49-year old LeBron James as he is surrounded guards that should probably be coming off the bench for a playoff team but instead, Danny Green and Avery Bradley are expected to play major minutes for this team looking to win the NBA Finals.

Then Rajon Rondo comes in and reminds everyone how washed he is as he sends poorly timed passes to Kentavious Caldwell-Pope who proceeds to put a hole in the backboard with his nightly bricks.

Alex Caruso is the most athletic guard on the roster which is a shame because I’m not even certain that he’s athletic. I’m just comparing him to Avery Bradley who I haven’t seen jump in 5 years.

So after the trade deadline came and went and the Lakers weren’t able to swap out Kyle Kuzma for a player that can actually contribute to their title run, there were rumors that they were courting the retired point guard, Darren Collison.

Look at this young god being woo’d by Lakers owner, Jeanie Buss. A free meal and a courtside game with Lakers ownership.

And today it’s being reported that Darren Collison will remain retired. A king. Run up the bill and then block their phone number when you get home. Scamming at the highest level.

No doubt in my mind that Collison had zero intentions of ever playing professional basketball again but man, did he want a night of free wine and a courtside game at the most expensive arena in the country.

This entire charade was a complete nonstory and does nothing but indicate how desperate the NBA media is to force the Lakers down our throat.

Darren Collison is a decent point guard who averaged 11.2 points per game last season with the Indiana Pacers. That’s cool or whatever but the discussion surrounding his acquisition was making it sound like he was the difference between winning and losing a championship.

Also, I’d like to take this time to remind everyone that I am still on Waiters Island so while all of you get your jokes off, Dion Waiters is going to get signed by the Lakers and hit the game-winning buzzer beater to bring the chip to Los Angeles.

Dion, Darren and I will be celebrating the Lakers title using Jeanie Buss’s credit card and overdosing on weed gummies





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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

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