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China is Fucking LiAngelo Ball

Lonzo Ball says he has not spoken with his younger brother LiAngelo since he and two other UCLA basketball players were reportedly involved in a shoplifting incident Tuesday in China.

”I haven’t talked to him yet,” Lonzo Ball said Wednesday night after his Los Angeles Lakers lost to the Boston Celtics. ”Whenever I talk to him, I’ll find out more.”

Pac-12 Conference Commissioner Larry Scott issued a statement Tuesday night saying that UCLA basketball players were ”involved in a situation” in China, with police being summoned to the team’s hotel to investigate the matter.

”UCLA is cooperating fully with local authorities,” Scott said.

Citing a person close to the situation, the Los Angeles Times reported that freshmen Ball, Cody Riley and Jalen Hill were involved in a shoplifting incident. Lonzo Ball starred at UCLA last season and is now a rookie with the Lakers. His father, LaVar Ball, is also in China and told ESPN that he was ”going to wait until I get more intel on what’s going on” before commenting.

(TheScore)

 

As we speak, China is fuuuucking the Ball brother that doesn’t matter. I am so conflicted about how hard I should be laughing and how bad I should feel about the 18-year old kid who got caught doing hoodrat shit with his friends. I’m laughing and crying as I write this.

It hilarious that the Ball brother who is the worst at basketball and probably shouldn’t even have a scholarship at UCLA and shouldn’t even be in China, but now he’s under house arrest in a Chinese hotel cut off from the rest of the world and can’t even watch his brother shoot 29% and 53% from the free throw line.

It’s also kind of scary because this is China. I’m pretty sure if you break the law in China, they cane you until there is a regime change. They might not release LiAngelo until Lavar stands up to tanks in Tiananmen Square.

Cooper Manning syndrome is real. The middle untalented brother will always have the worst life. LiAngelo Ball was destined to be a Chinese prisoner.

 

 

 

Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think LiAngelo Ball is going to be in a Chinese prison for the rest of time. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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