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Can We Talk About Matt Harvey’s ‘Bladder Infection’ For a Second?

So the New York Mets organization went into full panic mode after Matt Harvey suffered a mysterious non-baseball related injury. With Jacob deGrom set to miss opening day due to the birth of his child, Harvey was tasked with being the opening day starter for the Metropolitans.

Matt Harvey was diagnosed with blood clots in his bladder but that’s bullshit, right?

[su_quote cite=”NY Mag” url=”http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2016/03/matt-harvey-has-a-mystery-medical-issue.html”]The problem, Harvey explained, is that he too often tries to hold in his urine. Says Harvey: “I have to retrain my bladder to use the restroom a little more.”[/su_quote]

 

One of two things are true here: Either he was holding in his piss because it burned when he peed or he just had a UTI or HPV. Regardless, Matt Harvey was deep sea diving inside of some toxic waters and caught the itis.

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You don’t just wake up one morning with a bladder infection. Unless of course you woke up inside of some chick you left the bar with at 3am in which case yes, you can wake up one morning with a bladder infection.

I have no idea what is ever going on in Matt Harvey’s brain but I know 97% of it is non-baseball related. I’m not one of those guys that thinks he goes out too often or that he shouldn’t enjoy being a rich young celebrity and hump strangers. I’m just saying maybe he should stop casually missing meetings, practices and games because he’s hungover or picking up Plan B pills.

At the end of the day, love Matt Harvey or hate the man, you have to respect his commitment to going raw. We haven’t seen that dedication since ODB in 1996. Harvey is singlehandedly keeping the local pharmacy in business.

 

Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you actually think Matt Harvey just randomly got sick so I can block you.

TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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