Being The Buffalo Bills Starting Quarterback is the Easiest Job in Sports

Derek Anderson is a 35-year retired quarterback who was dragged off the streets to back up Josh Allen when it was clear to everyone that Nathan Peterman should not be allowed back onto a football field.

Little did Derek Anderson know that Josh Allen would suffer an elbow injury and Nathan Peterman had to be benched permanently before the rest of the Bills roster joined Vontae Davis in early retirements.

Also real quick, the amount of times I just used the word ‘retirement’ is not a great sign for Buffalo. This franchise has become purgatory between life and death where every day repeats itself. Wake up. Throw an interception. Go to bed. Fumble. Repeat.

Derek Anderson finished Sunday’s super close 5-37 loss with 175 yards passing, 3 interceptions and a lost fumble. Typical Bills shit. He did exactly what he was supposed to do out there. Those are Josh Allen numbers.

Being a Buffalo Bills quarterback is so easy that I wouldn’t be shocked if they had a fan contest to decide who starts next week on Monday Night Football against the New England Patriots.

There is no floor for failure. All you have to do is not get hurt and you’ll be back out there next week throwing footballs directly into the opposing teams’ arms.

You don’t have to win a damn game. If anything, you are penalized if you do actually win. Tyrod Taylor took the Bills to the postseason and he got sent out of town immediately. His historically low interception rate didn’t help him much either.

If Derek Anderson is out here throwing passes in 2018 then there’s a 50% chance I’ll be starting for this team by Week 17. Best case scenario, I have a 6 interception game and get offered $20 million guaranteed in the summer. Worst case scenario, I win.




Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you love the Bills quarterbacks as much as I do. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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