Apparently Barry Bonds is the Best Hitter on the Miami Marlins

How soon until the Marlins decide to make Barry Bonds both the hitting coach as well as the cleanup batter? By the time I finish writing this? Probably. At least pencil him into the lineup when you’re playing American League teams. He can still DH once a month.

Barry Bonds beating the entire Miami Marlins squad in a home run derby either speaks very highly of the wonderful and lasting effects of steroids or speaks extremely poorly of the Miami fucking Marlins. Bonds is 51-years old.

You cannot win baseball games if your teams batting coach is embarrassing the players. There’s a reason why Michael Jordan never shows up at Charlotte Hornets practices. Yes he’s aware he could destroy Kemba Walker 1-on-1 but what does that do for team morale. It’s cute once but next thing you know, Bonds is handing out HGH gummy bears during the 7th inning stretch.

Keep your Barry Bonds on a leash.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

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