andrew jensen
in

Guy Arrested For Burglary After Not Flushing Toilet During His Heist

A man accused of burglarizing a Southern California home took a bathroom break and left DNA evidence in the toilet that led to his arrest, an investigator said Tuesday.

The suspect “did his business and didn’t flush it” during the October break-in in the city of Thousand Oaks, said Detective Tim Lohman of the Ventura County Sheriff’s Office.

That allowed investigators to collect evidence to conduct a DNA profile. It matched another profile in a national database and detectives tracked down the suspect at his home in the nearby city of Ventura.

Andrew Jensen was arrested July 28 on suspicion of first-degree residential burglary, a felony. His bail was set at $180,000. Lohman did not know if Jensen, 42, has an attorney.

(KPTV)

 

Look, when you have to pee you have to pee. Whether you just wake up in the morning or you’re in the midst of a robbery, the bladder waits for no man. Can’t knock Andrew Jensen for relieving himself in this situation. It’s a high anxiety job, sometimes you have to ya know, pee.

Who the fuck are these hard dick detectives actually CSIing this burglary? Is this the first time ever that a home invasion was actually solved? Usually the cops just come and say ‘you um, sorry about your TV. We’ll for sure look into it.’ Then they file vague paperwork and shoot an unarmed teen before heading to Subway for a chicken teriyaki sub.

Poor Andrew Jensen. Maybe just like, pee outside next time instead of deciding to conserve water mid-crime.

 

 

 

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Written by TheLesterLee

TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture.

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