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4 Biggest Winners and Losers of the Kristaps Porzingis Trade

Spoiler: The Knicks didn’t win a Trade

Last week the Knicks traded their best player in two decades to clear up imaginary cap space and bring in Dennis Smith Jr, a player that they could have just drafted a couple years ago but nope, had to give up Porzingis to get him instead.

ANYWAY, with every blockbuster deal, there are winners and there are inevtiable losers.

Here are the 4 biggest winners and losers of the Kristaps Porzingis trade:

1. Dennis Smith Jr

What a world we live in where Porzingis and Dennis Smith Jr, two players who have done absolutely nothing in their NBA careers, have the power to not only demand trades but to have those demands met immediately.

And now Dennis Smith Jr emerges from Luka Doncic’s shadow and gets the keys to the Knicks franchise for at the miminum, the rest of the season which is great for him or whatever but a nightmare for the Knicks because he’s just a good enough scorer to ruin the tanking and worsen their draft pick.

2. Kristaps Porzingis

Kristaps is a restricted free agent coming off of an ACL tear. He has ZERO leverage yet still managed to get exactly what he wanted from the Knicks. I’m not sure if New York granted him his trade request out of respect and as a courtesy to Porzingis or if the Knicks are truly that bad at making decisions year after year. Both?

But what really makes Kristaps a winner is that Dallas is going to give him a long term max contract and Porzingis’s legs are going to explode but hey, those checks will always clear.

3. Luka Doncic

There are rumors that Dallas is now looking to add Nikola Vucevic to complete their big 3. The Mavs are really out here building a Euroleague team for Luka. We’re hours away from Dallas acquiring Pau Gasol and brining Toni Kukoc out of retirement.

4. Jimmy Butler

jimmy butler brett brown

We all know that all that freed up cap space is going straight to Jimmy Butler right? Don’t be shocked when the Knicks strike out on Kyrie and Durant and end up giving all of their money to Jimmy Butler and like, giving Mario Hezonja a max for no reason..

And now onto the losers…

1. Frank Ntilikina

The arrival of Dennis Smith Jr is going to make one thing abundantly clear: Frank stinks. I’ve had my suspiscions all season long and I don’t think David Fizdale handing Frank DNP’s on a nightly basis was just coincidental. Turns out, he’s bad at basketball.

Now the Knicks can openly purse Kemba Walker and Kyrie Irving and not have to worry about what to do with Frank. He is an after thought. Cut him or some shit. No one cares. Frank STINKS.

2. Enes Kanter

Lol at Enes for sitting for the last month and then seeing DeAndre Jordan come to town and immediately take all of his starting minutes. Kanter thought he wasn’t playing because he was too good and he’d effect the Knicks tanking but nope, he’s just sitting because his feet are stuck in concrete defensively and DeAndre Jordan can actually defend the rim.

But what really makes Enes a loser here is that he loves New York so much and he’s moments away from being cut and like, signing back with Utah or something. Laugh out loud.

3. Porzingis’s Legs

kristaps porzingis torn acl

Here is the one thing that the Knicks get credit for: they traded away an injury-prone 7-footer who has never been healthy for a full season. There is no reason to believe that suddenly his legs are full strength and he’s ready for a decade of dominance.

Remember when Gordon Hayward jumped for the alley oop and then his leg shattered into a million pieces? Guess what’s going to happen when Luka tries to lob one up to Porzingis and his long stilts land incorrectly? Yikes.

4. Knicks Fans

kristaps porzingis trade

What about the Knicks last two decades makes you truly believe that suddenly free agents are interested in playing in New York simply because they have cap space?

You know what a good team building plan is? Acquiring young affordable players and building through the draft.

You know what is a fucking stupid team building plan? Trading away young affordable players and just fucking HOPING that you sign free agents as if there aren’t 29 other teams you’re competing against for the same talent.

Kevin Durant is an internet troll who is constantly googling his name. He knows that all Knicks fans think he’s coming and being the massive asshole that he is, OF COURSE he’s not coming.

He’s going to announce he’s re-signing with the Warriors on Instagram and he’s going to use the hashtag #Knickstape and the Knicks are going to have Dennis Smith Jr and some cap space. Word. Can’t wait.

Fuck this Kristaps Porzingis trade.



Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee with who you think won and lost this Kristaps Porzingis trade. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Follow on Instagram so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.




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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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