Sidney Bouvier Gilstrap-Portley

25-Year Old Grown Ass Man Arrested For Pretending To Be a Teenager So He Could Play High School Basketball Against Kids

25-Year Old, Sidney Bouvier Gilstrap-Portley, who even has a grown ass name, just wanted to ball out and alllll of a sudden he ended up in handcuffs after pretending to be a refugee of Hurricane Harvey that ravaged Texas last year so that he could go back to high school and teach these kids the fundamentals.

Gilstrap-Portley enrolled at Skyline as Rashun Richardson at a time when the district had opened its doors to hurricane evacuees, said Dallas ISD spokeswoman Robyn Harris.

Gilstrap-Portley, who appears to have had a collegiate basketball career at Dallas Christian College, was a star for Hillcrest’s team for the 2017-18 season. High school coaches voted him the District 11-5A offensive player of the year. The Hillcrest Panthers finished the season with an 11-10 record.

Dallas ISD officials said Gilstrap-Portley’s charade came to an end after one of his former coaches from North Mesquite High School saw him playing at a tournament in April and recognized him as one of his players who graduated from high school seven years ago.


This is truly the definition of Ball is Life. Sidney Bouvier Gilstrap-Portley was playing college basketball like, two years ago but once you get that itch to hoop again, nothing can stop you. You’ll even pretend to be Rashun Richardson emerging from a horrific natural disaster just to lace em up again. You really have to respect his dedication to the game.

I mean, my man won Offensive Player of the Year, as he should. Imagine being 15 years old and playing against this grown adult who has spent a decade more time on Earth just posting you up on the low block. There’s nothing you can do. You’re still trying to get broccoli out of your braces and trying to understand why he gets boners every time Mrs. Harris bends over.1

The school had to have known he was old enough to rent a car, right? Seems like the athletic department was struggling and needed a big season and all of a sudden Rashun Richardson, who played college basketball down the road, showed up wearing a backward hat with a skateboard over his shoulder claiming to be a teenager and the head coach of the team just went along with the ruse.

Can’t. Knock. The Hustle.




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  1. both of these are legitimate things that happened to me at 15. Shout out Mrs. Harris.

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Written by TheLesterLee

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