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Let’s Wildly Speculate The 2020 New York Giants Record Based On Their Schedule

The 2020 New York Giants schedule has been released which means it’s time to go game-by-game and wildly predict wins and losses based on pretty much nothing. Let’s do this.

9/14, 7:15 pm
9/20, 1:00 pm
9/27, 1:00 pm
10/4, 4:05 pm
10/11, 4:25 pm
10/18, 1:00 pm
10/22, 8:20 pm
11/2, 8:15 pm
11/8, 1:00 pm
11/15, 1:00 pm
Bye Week
11/29, 1:00 pm
12/6, 4:05 pm
12/13, 1:00 pm
12/20, 1:00 pm
12/27, 1:00 pm
1/3, 1:00 pm


Week 1 vs. Pittsburgh 1-0

In five of the last seven seasons, the Giants have played in Dallas. They are 1-4 in those road games. Now they have the first Monday Night Football game of the season. In 2018, new head coaches went 0-for-7 in Week 1 but I have faith that Joe Judge can scam his way into a big Week 1 victory before the team turns on him later on in the season.

Speaking of 2018, that’s the season Ben Roethlisberger led the league in interceptions and then followed that spectacular season by blowing out his elbow. He’s old and weighs no less than 600 pounds right now. It’s a wrap for Big Ben.


Week 2 @ Chicago 2-0

The Giants have started six of the last seven seasons 0-2. I don’t see that occurring in 2020. Mitch Trubisky was so frazzled last year that he turned all the TVs off in the locker rooms to avoid criticisms. Good luck with an entire preseason of ‘Nick Foles should be the starter’ talk, coward.


Week 3 vs. San Francisco 2-1

We’ll know if this offensive line has improved by Week 3 but it won’t matter either way. The 49ers are going to rip Daniel Jones in half. But the Giants had to lose at some point, ya know, in honor of the great Don Shula.


Week 4 @ Los Angeles 2-2

As a proud Los Angeles Rams apologist, I’m giving Jared Goff a huge comeback season even this team did absolutely nothing to address their offensive line and replaced Todd Gurley and Brandin Cooks with worser versions of them. *whispers* go rams.


Week 5 @ Dallas 2-3

The Giants will beat the Cowboys this year but it won’t be in Dallas. Now that we got ragdolled by the NFC West, it’s the part of the schedule where we get ragdolled by our own division.


Week 6 vs. Washington 3-3

I wrote about my complicated relationship with Dwayne Haskins last season after Daniel Jones had his best game against Washington but time has passed. I have healed. And it’s fuck Haskins over here. Giants by a million.


Week 7 @ Philadelphia 3-4

This is tough knowing that the Giants have gone 12-24 against the NFC East since 2014. The Giants have also lost six straight games in Philadelphia and lost 11 of the last 12 games against them in total.


Week 8 vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers 4-4

I don’t understand why the Giants on are Monday Night Football again but okay. That makes me nervous. BUT Daniel Jones had one of his legendary wins against Tampa last season and I’m more concerned about DJ vs. that pass rush then old man Brady against the Giants defense.

eli manning daniel jones 2020 new york giants schedule

Eat a dick, Tampa.


Week 9 @ Washington 4-5

At some point, I should acknowledge that Ron Rivera is a better head coach than Jay Gruden and I have no idea why Gruden was there for so long. The Rivera-Chase Young combo miiiight be a problem for Daniel Jones and again, the Giants record in this division is atrocious.


Week 10 vs. Philadelphia 4-6

Fuck the Eagles


Week 12 @ Cincinnati 5-6

You know what sucks? The Giants are going to come off the bye week and beat the brakes off the Bengals and everyone is going to turn this into some narrative about how Joe Judge learned how to do a bye week the proper way when he was Bill Belichick’s gardener or whatever but in actually, the Bengals have zero good players on their roster but everything must lead back to the Patriots.


Week 13 @ Seattle 5-7

I don’t think fans will be allowed in the stands this season so Seattle won’t have a homefield advantage. Unfortunately, they’ll still have an advantage at literally every other aspect of the game.


Week 14 vs. Arizona 6-7

This is the most important matchup of the year as there was a weird erasure of how great Daniel Jones played. Kyler Murray had the best rookie season simply with his rushing numbers alone. But there’s this dumb notion that Murray AND Gardner Minshew are good and Daniel Jones isn’t in that convo. I want/need Daniel Jones to treat Kyler Murray like Nina Thomas treats Earl. Kick in the door guns out.



Week 15 vs. Cleveland Browns 7-7

This is the matchup that ESPN is going to shove down our throats. Literally might need to take a week or two off away from all sports media. Especially if Odell is having the type of season that Michael Thomas had last year. I don’t even want to talk about this.

OH, except that Case Keenum is going to be the starter because there’s a new GM and head coach they aren’t beholden to Baker’s mediocrity. And the Browns had the third worst rushing defense last season. Saquon Barkley is going for three hundo against them.



Week 16 @ Baltimore Ravens 7-8

This game is going to hurt. We’ll enter 7-7 right on the playoff bubble or maybe even fighting for the NFC East still if you remember how bad the division was last season andddd then the Giants will fly to Baltimore and hand Lamar Jackson his second consecutive MVP trophy after he runs up and down the field. Who’s going to stop him? Blake fucking Martinez?


Week 17 vs. Dallas Cowboy 7-9

Season’s over. I changed my mind. The Giants are going to get swept by the Cowboys and it’ll be a strange season where we were close to the playoffs but the team still has a bunch of holes and need help in the draft but they’ll have shitty draft position and fuck the Cowboys.





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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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