captain america civil war
in

Who Will Die in Captain America: Civil War?

So it’s become very clear that someone will die in Captain America Civil War. That’s just a fact at this point. The stakes are way too high to have all of the characters just brush themselves off at the end and shake hands. If you’re familiar with the comic book in which this movie is loosely based off of then you know that there were plenty of casualties.

There are plenty of fan theories going on out there. I try to stay out of those circles but I do keep my ear to the streets so I hear the rumblings. Let’s look at the odds of each character getting killed. I don’t have to say spoilers right? Like this is all bullshit but hang in there. Walk with me.

 

Spider-Man: 0%

There’s a zero percent chance that they kill off Spider-Man. He’s is the most exciting character going into the movie. He’s the fucking man. Don’t be dumb. He’s never dying.

 

Black Panther: 0%

It would really affect ticket sales if they killed Black Panther before his solo movie next year. But Marvel hates black people so anything could happen.

Ant-Man: 0%

Again, we’re getting an Ant-Man and Wasp sequel sooo it’s safe to say that we’ve got a lot more Paul Rudd on deck.

Scarlett Witch: 5%

For whatever reason, Marvel seems to love Scarlett Witch. That probably has a lot to do with the fact that by using her they can cockblock Fox Studios from using her. No idea what her powers actually are but let’s find out before she dies.

Vision: 5%

Vision has too much to do with the Infinity Stones to kill him. If the next two Avengers movies are all about Thanos collecting infinity stones, it’d be weird to kill the only character on the roster directly linked to that.

Hawkeye: 10%

No one loves Hawkeye more than Marvel Studios. They think he’s like, god’s gift to comedy. As long as they keep making Marvel movies, expect to see Hawkeye in some shape or form. Yay…

Black Widow: 20%

Marvel hates female characters so they may just kill Black Widow out of spite. Have they even casted an actress to play Ms. Marvel yet or are they really committing to not giving a fuck about women?

The Falcon: 60%

This could go either way. Either they don’t kill him off because no one would honestly care or they do kill him off for that same exact reason. Can’t imagine anyone shedding a tear for a character they’ve randomly forced on us but at the same time, he’s Captain America’s friend or whatever so I guess it’d be a big deal to him.

War Machine: 70%

So far in every trailer, War Machine gets his ass handed to him. Seems like it’s immediately when the fights start happening. The kid can’t hang. I think showing me near death is a pretty good misdirection by Marvel. I doubt they’d show a character’s death in the trailer. Seems like poor marketing.

Winter Soldier 90%

Out of every character, it seems most likely that Bucky won’t make it out of this movie alive. With the stakes being so high and emotions turned all the way up, Bucky will probably be dead by the 1 hour mark. I can completely see a scenario¬†where Iron Man fucks him up and the fight between Iron Man and Captain America gets REAL.

Captain America: 80%

In the original comic book storyline, Captain America is assassinated. Spoilers? Anyway, it wouldn’t be outlandish to think that they drop the hammer on is and kill Captain America. He is kind of the villain in the movie in a way. Actually, the real villain is Baron Zemo, a routine Captain America villain in the comics who appears to be pulling strings behind closed doors. Very possible he takes Cap’s life here.

Iron Man: 50%

I would love if they killed Iron Man. He’s the best character and the most beloved. NO ONE would see it coming. WILDCARD BITCHES.

 

 

Thanks for reading. Leave a comment or tweet to @TheLesterLee about who you think is going to die in Civil War.

Written by TheLesterLee

TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

10 Television Shows From Your Childhood That Deserve a Reboot

phil jackson

Phil Jackson Might Coach New York Knicks Home Games Next Season