guardians of the galaxy vol. 2

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7 Reasons Why Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is the Worst Movie Ever

The second installment of the Guardians of the Galaxy trilogy has hit the streets and has already made around a bajillion dollars after just one weekend. With Spider-Man fatigue and Thor kind of sucking, it’s safe to say that Guardians of the Galaxy will make Marvel all of the money.

But before I shit all over this movie, I want to quickly point out one thing that I truly loved about Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2: Ego, the Living Planet. Just as a comic book fan, I never could have predicted the day that a character who is literally a gigantic planet with a face would not only be depicted in a full length live action film but played by Kurt Russell.

Not only is it an accomplishment for comic books but visually it was stunning. It is the most obnoxious use of CGI and I don’t mean that negatively. No matter what’s going on in the scene, you can’t help but stare at the planet behind them and when Kurt Russell shows off his ability to terraform the planet, I couldn’t look away.

But enough saying nice things, here are 7 reasons why Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is the worst movie ever:

 

 

1. Too Many Mouths to Feed

There are so. many. characters. Every new scene introduces a brand new character that I’m supposed to care about. Last movie there were already plenty of Guardians and now they added Mantis, Yondu and Nebula and I’m supposed to keep up with all of this nonsense?

If I had to explain this plot I guess um, it’s the Sovereignty vs. The Ravagers vs. the Guardians vs. Ego, the Living Planet? On top of all this, we are supposed to care about Gamora and Nebula’s relationship while also dealing with Star Lord’s daddy issues while Baby Groot was dancing about in the background. Way too many mouths to feed here.1

  1. Not enough Howard the Duck